Ok, so I feel much better today, and started feeling much better yesterday. A few good night's sleep, some exercise, some reassessment of self, family and career, and all is back on track.
We have done some things we need to do to get ourselves back on track as individuals and as a family. I must say that the one good thing about my job, however temporary it was, put turtle on a schedule that is so beneficial, we will be keeping it. She is in bed at a decent hour and sleeps all night, providing enough time the rest of the evening for hubby-wife time AND for me to work, or clean, or be lazy and mindless. This alone is helping me tremendously. Part of what made everything seem so huge before was that we felt SO ALONE in it; and that made us feel beaten into the ground to the point that we didn't even want to get up. But in Mihigna's wise words, "You have to create energy to have energy."
Another great thing has happened. Mihgina came to the realization that he has become this person he never wanted to be, and wants to go back to his old ways; he wants to stop seeing the world through "scientific eyes" and get back to the open minded, zenish view, while going back to the basics and doing what makes him happy, TRULY happy. This makes ME happy!!!
We realized we have become these people we never wanted to be, who place value on things that aren't important. As a result, we lost touch w/ ourselves and what made us happy.
After realizing it, we took immediate action and that improved things almost instantly!
I will not take back or apologize for what I said in my earlier post, because that is exactly where I was at that time. I needed to roll around on the floor for a bit and shed a few tears.. and now I feel better and can get up and move on. I'm human.
So, a start of a new week, coming at it from a much better place and with plan!
1)We are unloading one of our burdens
2)I'm going to be serious about my photography and start marketing it and stop farting around and being wussy about it. Photography is something I CAN do right now, so I'm not abandoning my art self.
3)A friend and I have started a Mommy Coop, so we will trade off watching each others babies so that we both have time to do our own work.(She is also a stay at home mom who has taken a part time job working from home.)
So, those resolutions have taken a huge load off my mind... and improved my emotional state, and made me motivated. There's nothing like a plan to make things feel better.
Who am I kidding? I'm always planning, I always have a plan B and whenever there is a crisis, I immediately go into plan mode.
So, I feel much better.
Have a great Monday!