Sunday, November 30, 2008

My little artist

We did some painting today...she held the brush on her own, we simply gave it to her.

New Poem

I wrote a new poem, it's rough. I haven't written for awhile, it will get better. (Don't copy this with out permission please.)

The Visit
Mary Black Bonnet

Turkey Day plus two,
you walked into my dream.
Apologizing your tardiness,
you were checking the kids.
We talked laughed,
I almost forgot you were dead.

We watched someone's children playing outside,
you told me to be careful, they'd need me.
Your meaning slipped by me at the time,
then the boys came.

My precursor to motherhood.

I remember the day you died...
the gut level, body wracking sobs
that come from true sorrow.
The way I hid in my truck,
cried myself into a state of sleep.

Not caring if I woke up.

We gathered together again,
found resolve to go on.
Knowing if we gave up,
you'd be pissed.

I left for my house that night,
completely spent and numb.
I saw you walking down the road...
you smiled and waved.

I knew you were home.

C. 2008

Number One Thing I'm grateful for........

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Must read

This post is a must read:

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Pilamiya' ye

The pies were a success! Everyone LOVED them!

I found out that the pie mix wasn't bad,it was just natural pumpkin, it didn't have any preservatives OR high fructose corn syrup in it. AND it was in a STEEL container, that was recyclable!
Woo hoo! Score by pure luck!

We had a lovely day. Absolutely wonderful. We had dinner with mihigna's parents and sister and her hubby, and we were joined by a friend who is the drummer for the Inipis. Turtle was loving all the attention and adoring from her fan club! She had a blast, running around and playing (charming) everyone. After dinner I was able to take a family photo. I'm hoping to make that a holiday tradition from now on. We need it.

I am truly filled to the brim this year. I was last year, but I was still coming down off my new birth high. I don't recall much other than being so focused on turtle and enjoying having my parents and grandma there.

But this year is even more wonderful because we are back on this side of the river, (the "good" side, the home side.) We are not far from Mihigna's folks who would do anything for us and are crazy in love with turtle. (who isn't though?)They are so supportive to both of us and have been so welcoming to me since I walked into their lives.
I am so grateful to have turtle in our lives, she just completes everything.
We are closer to completing our dream of having our own "place" where we can settle down and raise turtle.
I have the best husband in the world, who pulls double duty of being amazing to both me AND turtle.
My life is rich,full and wonderful, and blessed beyond measure.
All is right in my world, and I am most grateful.
Pilamiya ye.

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

I caved like a fillingless pie....OR...Would you like some aluminum with that pumpkin?

I was telling you all about making my pumpkin pie from scratch right?
Well, I made it.
Then I ate it.
The filling was fabu!
The crust SUCKED!!!

So I went to the store, bought a pre- made pie crust, and pie filling and made another pie.

And ate that one. (Thank god for breastfeeding and kick ass genetics.) Hey, I HAD to try it to make sure it was of good enough quality to feed to the rest of the family.

So, now I have to make another pie for the actual festivities tomorrow. That one will be out of a can, and on a pre-made pie crust.

A bit of aluminum anyone?

Live and learn.. and then get a better pie crust recipe.

Hope I made you laugh.
Happy Turkey Day all!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

New discovery

I just discovered No Impact Man, have you heard of him? If not, go check him out. (Blog on sidebar.)
Very cool, very impressive, and very timely since I'm implementing my own electric diet.
My handcrank/solar powered radio was a success, I found one and have ordered it. I've become disgustingly addicted to Amazon. Damn, what has gotten into me? I'm suddenly interested in all these things I've always shied away from.
It must be the rural living, and my amazingly sad few number of friends. OH, and the cold weather. LOL.

electric diet and turkey day

I've always been big into self sufficiency, and all things natural. I have a product line that consists of home made soap, bath salts, etc. I've made my own laundry detergent, cleaners, bug spray and such, for years. I find it amusing that everyone is now "into" it.
I am however realizing how attached I am to electricity, and how I need to pare down my love affair with it. I've always been the light turner offer and appliance unpluger. But even with that said, I spend a lot of time on the Internet, and with music playing. SO, I'm going on an electrical diet. I'm going to pare down my computer time, and my music time. I am however going to go purchase a solar powered, hand crank radio, because then I will have music but also not have to suck up electricity for it. And all of this is also for a higher purpose. Well, besides being jsut enviromentally responsible.

As many of you know, we have been searching for our little niche in the world. We looked at a few houses, and land and nixed both because of cost. We have decided. This was part of the big news, and I'm still going to hold out on some details for now. But, we will be purchasing land in SD and building a house on it. Right now, we are looking to build a Straw bale house, we have always wanted and planned to do that. We are also going to attempt to be off grid, with wind and solar power. But, I don't want to get too far ahead of myself. We still have to take it step by step. I will update as I know more. But this is why i need to go on an electricity diet. I will need to pare down my electricity use when we are off grid. You can supply your own electrcity but it will also show you how m uch you use just with your refriderator or coffeee pot. (To see this, go online and see an episode of It aint easy being green on the sundance channel.)
So, all exciting things. More when there is more to update.

For turkey day, we are going to mihignas parent's house, that will be fun. They are enjoyable people and cunksi just loves them, plus she gets to hang out with her cousin!


Miriam Makeba has passed away, she was an amazing South African singer. I discovered her via World link tv.
Go look her up and listen to her music.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Saturday, November 22, 2008

My Heart Could Burst.....

with how much I LOVE them!
They are my favorite people in the world.



It's been a busy couple of days around here for the little turtle. She's doing all kinds of amazing things. She has started "marching" now. And today she said "bye bye" for the first time. She is running, and sorting things. Running and sorting things is a 18-24 mo milestone. She is so amazing!

Last Sat, mihigna got a deer, so we have been enjoying the fruits of that labor! I'm salting the pelt right now, it's down in the basement. I've never done that before, so we'll see what happens! I should post pics of it for you! I should have done a before and after. Oh well. Maybe you'll just get an "after."

Today we made pumpkin pie from scratch. I've become very domestic these days and am making as many things as possible from scratch. I prefer this because I don't want preservatives or nitrates in the food Turtle, or I, or Mihigna eats. It's all cumulative, and since she is still breastfeeding, I need to be aware of that. What I mean by that is, lets say we eat something with nitrates in it; well she eats her portion of whatever it is we are eating, and then I eat mine. She gets a dose of it from the food she ate, then whatever is passed to her through my breast milk. And yes, things like that do get passed. So, I have stopped buying bread, spaghetti sauce, canned pumpkin, canned biscuits, anything in cans really, because they are in aluminum cans or aluminum lined canisters... and we don't need aluminum poisoning either. So, it has been a lot of home made stuff. Which I am loving.. and so is the fam. I'm making pumpkin pies for turkey day, from scratch. Turtle loved cleaning out the pumpkin for them, and i love knowing exactly what is in my pie.

On thursday, we went to the bowling ally and she was playing with some girls and she fell and smacked her head on the floor, and got a huge gooseegg.. holy shit was I scared. I called the dr to make sure I didn't need to take her in, (this was only after I prevented myself from driving directly over there, because I was so panicked.) She has never had a goose egg before. I felt bad for her, but I felt horrible that it happened. I took her home and put some burt's bees boo boo juice on it, and it is all better. It never even bruised. I was worried, because it was really huge when it happened. I LOVE BURT'S BEES, this stuff is soo great, it is universal and helps with everything! She is fine, but man, that was rough on me!

It was so lovely here today that we took a walk this afternoon. We went to the fish hatchery, we went to the canyon first, but realized it was still hunting season.. so we went to the hatchery instead. She had a blast, walked around and looked at everything. Then she got cold, so we had to hightail it back to the van.

Tonight, she put herself to bed, and is sleeping really well. Her grandparents were here for a visit, and she told them to "go bye bye" so she could go to bed! It was so funny! So, I put her to bed, and she is sleeping peacefully.

So, I'm off to do some Ina work.
for now,

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

What's at the center

Turtle took all the paper towels off to get to the roll, so she could have her music maker. She loves these, and will play them or the toilet paper rolls.
On her birthday, our friend housefly came to visit her and brought his didgeridoo; she LOVED it, and has been playing the paper towel rolls as a didgeridoo ever since.
We are looking to find her a smallish turtle size didgeridoo for xmas.

She also helped me bake cookies today, and licked her first batter mix spoon! We had a lot of fun! Tonight, she helped me decorate while wearing her santa hat. She then went on to help her Ate' fix the vacuum and then vacuum the house.
She is such a good helper!

Friday, November 14, 2008

It's snowing again

It was a wonderfully snowy day here! It is still snowing, the ground is all covered up again with a soft fluffy white blanket. I love how quiet it gets when it snows, so quiet you can hear it. When Mihigna and I were first together, that is one question he asked me, "can you hear snow fall?" I told him yes. It was fate. 9 years later, we still love each other... and love to listen to snow fall.

I bought holiday decorations today. Fun! It will a bit hard to do this year, because we are in this tiny apartment, and we can't put anything on the walls, but we will manage.

Mihigna is going deer hunting tomorrow. I am actually excited for him to go. I have never really given it much thought; but for some odd reason, I've caught the hunting bug. I guess because I will be glad to fill our freezer with deer meat. Yummariffic!

Yerba Mate

We LOVE Guayaki Yerba mate'! We ordered some in bulk and it came with this wonderful label. If you can't read it, it says that the bag is made entirely from compostable and biodegradable material!! WHOO HOO FOR GUAYAKI!!! They are 100% organic as well as fair trade, not to mention the fact that their mate' is YUMMA-RIFFIC!

A new batch of snow is softly coming down to replace the snow that melted yesterday, XM has started playing it's 24/7 christmas music, all is well in the world. At least my corner of it!

And this year, turtle will really have fun! She loves to go outside and play in the snow. Here is a picture of her first snow play.

And now, we're off to go find a sled suitable for a baby girl! And maybe to put up holiday decorations... turkey themed things.

What do you love about the holidays?

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

61 Trees

I LOVE NPR, and for some odd reason, when it gets cold, I yearn for NPR's comforting public radio ishness. You NPR lovers know what I mean.

As turtle slept, NPR played on my portable radio, flowing out the morning news from around the world. That is when I heard the story about this scientist woman who decided to use her science wiles to find out how many trees were on earth. It was a surprising large number...sigh of relief. But, then she broke it down to trees per person. nervous, sweating commenced.... the number was 61.
We all have 61 trees for our very own person, if you will. That made me relax a bit, but then she went on to tell us about how she told her husband that number and he said, "It seems like a lot, but then you think about the wood we used to build this house and the wood we use in our woodstove, and suddenly, it doesn't seem like very much." (more or less loosely quoted.) They went on to talk about all the wood related items that are in our world, and boy, those personal trees not only disappeared so fast I heard them go "pop" but, I started seeing people having to steal other people's trees just due to thier rampant use of wood products.... I was saddened. And a bit afraid. Much like I felt after watching An Inconvient Truth.

But, they told us that the good thing about trees is they are replenishable.
So they are. I know this, and love this fact. I was told that when you do something big, like build a house, you are supposed to plant three trees for every one that you tear down. I made a note to myself that I would indeed, do that, if not more. We have yet to own land on which to build said house, but what the hell. I'll plant trees anyway. In this town, they were rampaged by fire last year, and so it is a constant thing around here for people to be out planting trees. I will be joining them.

And when we do get our land.. I will be planting as many trees as I possibly can.
But even more than that, I'm going to be SUPER aware of my wood product consumption.... because I don't want to have to be stealing anyone else's trees just to keep me in whatever bad- tree -consuming habit I may have. After all, I might as well think that those are my Daughter's trees I'm stealing.

That has enough power for me to get it right.

What are you going to do with your 61 trees?

Monday, November 10, 2008

The new book!

The new book is out!

It looks really good, and I have been so busy being a mom, I forgot it was coming out!
I'm in the book among some incredible authors, as always. Marijo Moore is an excellent editor and has edited a a lot of really great anthologies.


Up north of us, they were all snowed in. Both mihigna's sets of parents were snowed in. We didn't get it bad down here... just icy and snow on the ground. It was a nice weekend. I loved it, mihigna was home, since he couldn't go to the rez to go access...due to snow drifts. So, we all hung out here, and played with turtle, who kept us amused for hours, as she always does.

We have some good news.. but I'm not quite ready to share it yet. So, when I am, I will.
I went shopping today, to stock up on some things, now that we have a freezer, a chest freezer, yey!!! It is such a relief to have that thing, it really has made me paranoid with all this crazy weather. Although, since this house is all electric, if we lost power for days on end, like they have up north, we might be screwed. Which is why we need to get our own place ASAP, where we can have solar and wind power and not have worries if we lose electricity.

Turtle's hampas came in today, as well as her crayons. The hanpas were too small, even though I measured against their foot thing, so they will have to be exchanged for a bigger size. But she LOVES her crayons.. and I don't have to worry about any toxins gettting into her since she is still in the "let's eat it" phase. They are beeswax crayons from a place called FABULOUS website, that I will be using again and again. They get a four star rating from me!!!

This weekend, we also went on the hunt for the elusive baby snow boot. Let me tell ya, in this small town, NE, they are non exsistant! What a rip off. Mihigna said it is probably because as soon as they can walk here, they are put in a pair of cowboy boots. He said that is what they wore when they were small. Well, yes, as did I, but I also remember very well how fricking froze ass my feet were. GRanted, I loved them too much to take them off, but now as a mother, I dont' want my daughter's feet to be cold however "fun" cowboy boots are. See, my mother WAS right.. She did know way more than I gave her credit for growing up. OYY, it's all coming back to bite me in the butt!! LOL. What goes around comes around.... My mother was a saint when it came to raising me and putting up with me, I certainly gave her a run for her money. (Literally, lol.)

I find myself worrying about things reguarding turtle that i remember my own mother worrying over. Was I dressed warm enough, did I have the best choice of foot wear for such cold conditions, why on earth wouldn't I keep my hat on? When I was a child, I simply could not understand why she was so concenred about such things, things that were hardly a blip on my screen. Aaaa, but now. Now I GET it. Because I am in the postion of worrier. My little turtle is a mini me, she wants to run amuck with no clothes on, and no shoes and no hat.
mother forgive all my shrugging off your concern. I get it now, I SO get it. But the great thing about my mother was that she knew me well enough to know that she could say all she anted to me, but I was a child of life school, i wouldn't do anything unless i learned the consequences on my 0wn. "oh, so when you don't wear a hat on a very cold day.. you do get cold faster." Oh, wearing cowboy boots in three feet of snow is not only a slipping hazzard, it also makes for wet, cold feet."
My mother gets so much credit. and I will now be able to take the deep breath she had to many tiimes, step back and let turtle do take the same path I did. Hopefully, she will learn thigns faster than I did. But, I love knowing that turtle is like me. She has my tenacity, and my zest for life. I love it. I will be able to be here to help her, when she needs it....and sometimes when she doens't think she does.

In other news, I'm excited for the holidays. I have not been excited for a few years. I was always a big holiday person, then after we lost the babies and I slipped into that deep depression, I stopped doing anything big for the holidays. But then turtle came. And my excitement it back.
I have called MIL to see if she will come over for xmas and mihigna's sister. I have big plans for baking and decorating and making some gifts. I love the holidays, and it will be really fun this year, because turtle will be able to do more things. She loves to help cook and wash dishes.
I'm excited!

Saturday, November 8, 2008


I called my In- laws today, they live about 35 miles up the road, and they got SLAMMED by a storm this weekend. They finally JUST got out. I will put the pic on here, if i can. Scary scary. They have everything electrical, so they didn't have any heat or way to eat warm food.
That is why we will have solar AND wind power when we build our place.
These winter storms are only going to get worse, and we will be prepared.

Damn, it won't let me upload them.
if I figure out another way, I'll put them up.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008


My man won the election, oh, in case you haven't heard! HA ha!
I caught the tail end of his acceptance speech and saw Oprah leaning on some guys shoulder crying the same tears that were falling down so many people's faces, as well as my own. No, you anti-obamans, ours were HAPPY tears!
I can't fucking believe it, and yet I can.
My daughter went with us to the polls to vote today, (and tried to vote herself) which I will get to put down in her baby book that she was 13 mos old during one of the most important election years in MY life time, as well as hers. Well, hopefully this will only be ONE of many important, life changing elections in HER lifetime.
I'm so excited, I'm so relieved, things feel much lighter, much safer now.
I'm so happy, I wish I could give Obama a BIG hug, though, now that he is gonna be the Prez, I'm sure his body guards wouldn't like that too much. But the world needs more hugging anyway.

I am so happy I am goofy!
I want to run down the street shouting whoo hoo's at the top of my lungs... drive down the street with confetti and blow my horn! But, in this majority mcain supporters, I don't think that would go over to well.
I am only nine miles from teh state line, but I miss being a Sodakan, and having to vote in NE was a bit sad. SD is my HOME and my HEART.
Gotta get back there, ASAP!!!!!
be well, sleep more peacefully now that we have this gentle, knowlegeable papa bear in our corner.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

update and Ina type things

We had a great holloween, turtle went to a holloween party hosted by her cousin's school. Her GPs were there, and so they all had fun together. She played some games and won some prizes. She did not however, win a costume catagory. The judges were blinded by her adorableness and simply couldn't even see her.
In the afternoon, we went downtown and walked in the annual holloween parade. Wow! What a great thing! Every, well most every, child in our town, and parent walks down main street in thier costumes, it is so cool! The streets are blocked off and everything. Then, when they reach the end, they go back down to every shop and go trick or treating. SO COOL!!!! Turtle and I walked in the parade and then went to all her patron friends to say hello. They all loved her of course, and were all so happy to see her dressed up. Officer Mcbride saw her and said "That is the best costume I have seen all day! She is really cute! " AWWW! Then he gave her a Jr. PD officer sticker! Just cute!!! I wished I could have taken pics of it all, but I was carrying turtle, so I couldn't shoot any. I'm very glad we got to do that, it was a lot of fun, and a memory for turtle.
On sat, we went to K, K and W's holloween party, and had a BLAST! There were all kinds of great people there and we made new friends and had a grand time! We playes some games and laughed a lot! Turtle jumped right in and played wiht the other children and charmed all the adults! Everyone wanted to hold her and talk to her! She even sat on E's husbands lap! Whoa!
It was a very cool, fun weekend!
The weather has been fab! Tday it was 80! It is supposed to be nice until wednesday, so we will be outside again tomorrow!
Today, I finally got around to watching Juno. I was dissapointed. I don't know what I expected, but not that. J.Garner did a fabulous job of being a longingly childless woman though. I was very happy wiht how it turned out though.. for her anyway. That is really all I have to say about that.
I'm glad it is novemeber, I'm ready for some cool weather and holidays.