Friday, April 11, 2008

As we get closer to this move, i get more excited. For many reasons. Part , a large part of the reason we are moving, is to be closer to our tiwahe. Those first three months after Cunksi was born, were pretty hard, and at times very scary.

While we had both been around babies and children before, Mihigna with his niece, and I with my nephews. (who've I've practically raised since their births.) But no matter how many newborns I had cared for, it was truly different when it came to my own Cunksi. Granted, my nephews didn't have any problems with reflux, so that was our initiation by fire with Cunksi. But those late nights, when she was in so much pain, and crying and we were walking the floors, looking at each other through sleep deprived eyes, we were wishing we had tiwahe around. We just needed to know that we were doing it right, and that she and we, were going to be ok. We made many calls to his family to make sure, and I called his step mom a lot, worried that i was surly doing something wrong. She was wonderful enough to let us know that they were proud of us and that we were doing a great job. That helped.

So, after it all died down and we felt like we had a handle on things, we decided it was still time to go home. Home is HOME. There is no place like it ANYWHERE. And even though we said we wouldn't raise Cunksi on the Rez, we figured if we were going to go home, the time to do it would be now, when she was small.
So, as things happen, everything fell into place. We got the kind of situation we needed, and we were able to work things out so we can move home. We are both very, very happy. There are a lot of people back home that we need Cunksi to meet before their time on this earth is up. We won't always have our elders around and I want them to be a part of her life while they still can. Plus, it will be easier for me to raise her as a lakota first speaker from home, than I would be able to from here.
I'm grateful things have fallen into place, as they do when things are meant to be. I'm grateful that we have such a belief in Tunkasila and know that when you put it out there, if it is meant to happen, it will.
I love my life, I love mihigna na cunksi.

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